3257: 50 Ways to Say Goodbye
| 50 Ways to Say Goodbye |
 Made by: SonicLover |
Explanation[edit | edit source]
The comic is a parody of the song 50 ways to say goodbye where the singer must come up with lies about how someone died. The comic takes strips from the original comic (and some from the sromg comics) to show how Garfield died.
Transcript[edit | edit source]
{A panel annotated 1995/03/25, in which Jon and Garfield are in an airplane experiencing turbulence} Lyrics: She went down in an airplane {A panel annotated 1978/09/21, in which Garfield discovers his stomach is sunburned} Garfield: Snort, uh-oh! Lyrics: Fried getting suntanned {A panel annotated 1987/10/04, in which Garfield is setting up a cement mixer by a net, hole, and mirror} Garfield: Then this cement mixer will tip, sealing that sucker up for about ten million years Lyrics: Fell in a cement mixer full of quicksand {A reproduction of SRoMG #672, annotated as such, in which Garfield commits suicide by recliner before Jon can catch him} Garfield: I can't bear the thought of trudging through another dismal February Jon: ♪ Lyrics: Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes! {A panel annotated 2000/04/09, in which Jon is looking mangled at the beach with Garfield and a shark looking at him} Jon: Well, it can't get any worse than this Shark: You called? Lyrics: She met a shark under water {A panel annotated 2005/03/08, in which Jon falls down with a WAAHHH and a CRASH while Garfield looks on} Lyrics: Fell and no one caught her {A panel annotated 2010/12/23, in which Jon is looking at perfume with Garfield present} Jon: Maybe Liz would like some perfume Lyrics: I returned everything I ever bought her {A reproduction of SRoMG #1507 annotated as such, in which Odie discovers a dead Garfield} Odie: Whimper Jon: Yes, Odie, Garfield is dead. I'll go get the shovel and bury him Lyrics: Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies and ways to say you died {A panel annotated 1986/04/18, in which Jon's dad and Garfield are standing in a pool of mud} Dad: Kind of muddy today, isn't it, Garfield? Garfield: It is Lyrics: She was caught in a mudslide {A panel annotated 1983/01/16, in which Garfield is in a lion's cage, unaware of the lion behind him} Garfield: That was a pretty convincing performance, if I do say so myself Lyrics: Eaten by a lion {A panel annotated 1988/06/12, in which Odie is driving a purple car with a VRMM} Lyrics: Got run over by a crappy purple Scion {A reproduction of SRoMG #1683 annotated as such, in which Jon discovers to little shock that Garfield has died} Jon: One second, let me get a pen... Jon: Gotta go, I think my cat just died. Lyrics: Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes! {A panel annotated 1989/11/03, in which Garfield is pretending to starve to death} Garfield: Thirty days without food or water, lost in the burning desert! I can't last much longer... this is it, men... Lyrics: She dried up in the desert {A panel annotated 1979/08/30, in which Garfield falls into a bathtub with a SPLOOSH!} Lyrics: Drowned in a hot tub {A panel annotated 1992/09/12, in which a disco ball has fallen on Jon's head while Garfield looks on unimpressed} Garfield: Let's boogie on home. I'll lead Lyrics: Danced to death at an east side night club {A reproduction of SRoMG #2552, annotated as such, in which Garfield strangles himself trying to unravel an ugly sweater} Garfield: There's more than one way to skin a cat SFX: TWANG Lyrics: Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies and ways to say you died
Author writes[edit | edit source]
I happened to know that killing off Garfield was a recurring gag in SRoMG. I also happened to know that setting Garfield panels to song lyrics was another recurring thing in SRoMG. I stumbled upon these lyrics on TV Tropes (more specifically the quotes page for The Many Deaths Of You). So I strung it all together (after weeks of procrastination, that is).
Original song: ["50 Ways to Say Goodbye"] by Train.
Original strips and Square Root of Minus Garfield strips: see annotations on individual panels (links are in transcript).
